After going through shitty relationships one after another I decided to take some time off for myself. These last few months have been dedicated to understanding myself, my mind and my soul. I realized I knew so much about every damn bollywood actor, actress and the great athletes around the world that I was not in tune with myself. Why is it that we can read books, watch movies or TV shows and give detailed summaries about them? Whereas when it comes to ourselves we neglect the depth needed to understand the real us.
I learned to face my good qualities and attempt to fix my bad ones as well. Have I improved, only time will tell. What i can tell you is that I am confident about who I am as a whole. I don’t need people to like me, appreciate me or show me love because I do that for myself. Now why does all of this matter and why is this linked to my shitty relationships-here’s why! I was going into relationships hoping someone would fix my self image issues, confidence, and fill any voids I have. I relied on someone else to provide me with assurance that I am good enough or that I am someone that can be loved. It made me clingy, overbearing, and someone who was unable to grow as a whole while in a relationship.
With taking this time off I worked on each aspect of myself individually, one by one. First thing I changed was my diet! Yes my diet! I started eating clean food, home cooked meals and stopped eating just because I was bored. Secondly, I started doing things alone that gave me time to feel things. Whether it’s working out, going to the park, hiking or driving down to the city just to explore. I found ways to have me, myself and I time! It helped me approach strangers just to talk and be comfortable all alone without much assistance. Lastly, I trained my mind to believe in myself, my ideas, and my goals in life. I respect everyones suggestions and opinions but Its my life after all and I am in the driver seat, not you!
Take a break from social media, music, TV, friends or shitty relationships just to feel good about yourself. We are humans and are made in a way to love another human on a mental, emotional and physical level. Until your future partner walks into your life just build your mind, body and soul because it will only help you and your partner grow into something far more special than anyone in the past ! Learn to love yourself and understand who you are better than any celebrity you adore from afar. Stop letting others grab the wheel of life from you just because they add nothing but a presence that fill a void.